One year during home assignment, we put our sons in a private Christian school. We thought the environment would be less of a shock to our MKs used to life in Indonesia, but that proved not to be the case. How hard it was to watch both of them struggle—adjust to culture, make friends, understand idioms, wait for invitations, figure out this new life. I grieved for my boys. I wanted to take away their hurt and pain. I just wanted them to be happy. How much more so, Mary grieved for her son. Listen to what Mary had to witness and endure on his behalf:
Jesus left there and went to his hometown, accompanied by his disciples. When the Sabbath came, he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were amazed. “Where did this man get these things?” they asked. “What’s this wisdom that has been given him? What are these remarkable miracles he is performing? Isn’t this the carpenter? Isn’t this Mary’s son and the brother of James, Joseph, Judas and Simon? Aren’t his sisters here with us?” And they took offense at him. Mark 6:1-3
Among the crowds there was widespread whispering about him. Some said, “He is a good man.” Others replied, “No, he deceives the people.” “You are demon-possessed,” the crowd answered. John 7:12, 20
All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove [Jesus] out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff. Luke 4:28
They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. John 8:6
Then the Pharisees went out and began to plot with the Herodians how they might kill Jesus. Mark 3:6
The chief priests and the whole Sanhedrin were looking for evidence against Jesus so that they could put him to death, but they did not find any. Many testified falsely against him, but their statements did not agree. Mark 14:55-56Grieved! Hurt! Pierced! Surely Mary felt the pain of Jesus' rejection, loss of reputation, and friends, especially among the neighbors. Usually, a celebrity has total acceptance and carte blanche among the home crowd. So when they don't, it pierces even more.
No mother wants her child to be an offense to others. We want our children, nieces, nephews and those we mentor to be liked, accepted, respected and loved by all. And how much more grieved are mothers of children with disabilities or social anxieties or mental illness? These moms especially understand the words of the author of Hebrews: Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering. Hebrews 13:3
What did Mary do? Did she rankle at the injustice? Was she angry at the mockers? Tempted to speak up in his defense? Or did she wish he wouldn't be so bold or abrasive? Maybe change his tone or his approach? Why does he say such controversial things? Why did he do that? Doesn't he realize the neighbors are talking? I don't want him to get hurt. Play it safe so that he doesn't have to suffer. Be normal so nobody notices. Had she expected that the Savior would be embraced with open arms? Did she think he could take David's throne peacefully?
I think Mary did what she had always done. She remembered—the prophecies, the exact words of the angel, Jesus' reply in the temple. And she pondered—the miracles he performed that showed his power over death, illness and nature; the words he spoke that revealed his identity as the bread of life, the lamb of God, the door, the way, the light, the living water.
Mary's unwavering faith enabled her to stand with Jesus in his pain and support him with her presence. And eventually, her journey led her to become a true disciple, to actively participate in the first church planting effort—to spread the Gospel.
What words and actions have you witnessed about your loved ones that have pierced your soul?
What promises from God do you have to remember and ponder? (See Dt 10:18, Is 53:2-3, Jn 15:15, Ps 145:8-9, 18 for starters)
What miracles and teachings of Jesus strengthen your faith?
How can you channel your grieving into spreading the Gospel?
Lord Jesus, I pray for all who grieve watching their children struggle to lead a normal life, to be accepted, and loved. I pray for those whose hearts are pierced because of the pain their loved ones endure due to the ignorance and cruelty of others. Strengthen their faith, remind them that you too endured ridicule and rejection and show them how to direct their pain into spreading the news of your salvation.